Do you ever have one of those projects that you think, Oh yes. I can absolutely do that. And that. AND THAT! And YES, THAT TOO!!! Well- I won’t lie. That was me this past summer. And through all my “yeses”, the blog stayed quiet. This summer I scaled up my dahlia production from 400 plants and 400 varieties to 700 PLANTS with 250 varieties.
And let me tell you….I learned. SO MUCH.
I learned exactly how sun exposure and water truly do affect growth. I planted in some areas thinking “Bah! It will be fine!” (Definitely wasn’t fine) and had a water situation that totally SHOULD have worked (also….didn’t work). And then surprised myself with somethings that shouldn’t have worked but they ACTUALLY DID!!
I kept telling my husband, Buck, all summer, “I’m just enjoying the success of my garden!” Because guys, it was just SO BEAUTIFUL this year.
In fact, this summer was so full of growing successes I found myself struggling a little bit with “imposter syndrome”. Like, “Wait….I ACTUALLY grew this!? I made this happen. Are you for real!?”
I had plants grow to over 10 FEET TALL! Ten. Feet. Tall. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I could grow a behemoth like that. But I did.
And you know what else?
I spent a glorious amount of time just genuinely tending my garden. Dead-heading, weeding, labeling. Things that made Buck and my kids go “ick- no thank you”.
But for me? I loved it ALL. Sure, I had weeds. I had blackberries trying to take over. I even learned about leaf-boring beetles…. the HARD WAY. But I absolutely loved coming out and watching the honeybees working, the yellow jackets hunting, and the hummingbirds dive-bombing each other.
For a while, I even had my garden ducks hanging out with me. (Until the hawks and raccoons made swift work of them. R.I.P. Merry and Pippin.) I saw a lot of ‘nature being nature’ Some of it beautiful. Some of it…not so much. But there was something incredibly grounding about all of it. Like I could walk out into the garden and just take a deep sigh, ya know?
I needed that so much more this summer than I needed massive sales or giant gatherings or attending all the Farmer’s Markets. Because this summer had some sadness too.
My grandmother passed away in September.
I won’t lie. My garden took a backseat for about a month. When we could see the end coming, and in the weeks after she left, I took a lot of quiet moments just sitting out there. Sometimes just numb with the heaviness of it all. Sometimes crying. Sometimes just giving my anxiety-filled hands something to do. And yet…
I am SO LUCKY.
I got my Grandma for 41 years. Not many people can say that.
But I can.
And even though she never got to see my garden with her own eyes, only through pictures I shared with her, I know she loved it.
And that’s enough.
And now with October in full swing, I’m looking ahead at DIGGING SEASON! Which some people describe as sad or difficult to see or plain ‘ole hard.
I get it. I mean, I just spent ALL SUMMER lovingly caring for that beautiful patch of dirt and amazing flowers. That could absolutely be construed as sad- but I AM SO FRIGGIN EXCITED!
Guys. I get to chop it all down! I get to DIG! And I CANNOT WAIT to see the tubers waiting for me! (Don’t mind me. This is where my nerd-ness kicks in.)
I know which plants I enjoyed growing, and which ones I’m already looking at like “yeah,…you and I aren’t a good match”. But now I get to see the tubers- I get to see what these things are REALLY made of.
And of course, because apparently 700 plants weren’t enough to keep me busy, I also couldn’t help but collect some seed pods…
Like really Erin? I KNOW I don’t have time for more….but what if?
What if there’s a really amazing dahlia somewhere in that seed pile? I just have to find it.
So yeah, while October CAN feel like “the beginning of the end.” But what if October is the beginning of another beginning? (Oh man, that sounds so corny.) But for real though!
I am SO READY for sweater weather and movies while it rains. I’m ready to slow down. To breathe. TO PLAN! And to start getting excited about what next season could bring.
I have loved this summer. The successes, the surprises, the lessons (better raccoon-proofing). And while I don’t have to love the hurts, I can accept them too. But I’m also ready for what’s next. Maybe that’s my curse to constantly be looking forward. It can make it hard to remember to slow down. But that’s what my garden is for, right?
What does it need right now? What do I NEED RIGHT NOW? Right now, my garden and I are both on the same page. We need a break. We need some time to reflect and then look forward.
But first? WE DIG!
***Spoiler Alert*** There WILL be more garden ducks in my future…
To Be Continued.
